Men's Rights Agency -
Feminism
B. The agenda of the fathers' rights movement continued
5. Domestic violence and child abuse
A. False allegations of violence
A common complaint by fathers' rights groups is that women falsely allege domestic violence and/or child abuse on the part of their male partners in order to gain a tactical advantage in family proceedings. Parent Without Rights states that "[d]i aily, false claims of child sexual abuse are being made (mainly by mothers) against fathers, particularly in regard to custody or access applications before the Family Court.”234 Parents Without Partners claims that 98 per cent of appeals against intervention orders are successful, presumably suggesting that this percentage of orders are based on false claims, and are simply obtained by women to get priority in proceedings.235 The Lone Fathers Association states that:
A growing body of evidence supports the contention that women are increasingly using false allegations in the shadow of the law to achieve better bargaining positions in child custody and property settlements, or merely to discharge vindictive feelings against former intimates.236
Men's Confraternity also suggests that women are making false allegations not just for tactical gain, but for pleasure in the suffering they thereby cause men:
The woman then plays "carrot and stick games" with access and tries to turn the children off their father. A nasty "catch-22” means of gaoling the father is used by women who obtain a restraining order the day before access is due, tip off the police the moment the father appears and suggest a scene of massive violence thus drawing the police force into the game as useful and effective pawns to provide them with a quite sadistic form of entertainment...237
Furthermore, Lone Fathers suggests that some mothers may be suffering from:
A contemporary manifestation of Munchausen by proxy... in which a parent or other adult caretaker fabricates or induces the idea that a child has been abused and then gains recognition from professionals as the protector of the abused child.238
It goes on to say that "it is not the intention of this Issues Paper to underplay the importance of protecting the sexually or otherwise abused child whether in a custody dispute or in any other judicia1 forum”.239 Despite this qualification, the shift in focus onto the woman's pathology does induce the disappearance of the reality of sexual abuse. As Lynne Harne and Jill Radford have noted when discussing other psychological syndromes sometimes utilised by fathers' rights groups, such as Parental Alienation Syndrome,240 the shifting of child welfare discourses into the province of experts in psychotherapy makes them "unchallengeable except by other experts of the psyche".241
Many fathers' rights groups suggest that there aren't adequate checks in the system to weed out false from genuine complaints of violence or abuse. Parent Without Rights, for example, states that mothers only need to allege impropriety, without providing any proof, and they are believed. In its opinion intervention orders are handed out by magistrates like "lollies at a children's party".242 The Lone Fathers Association says that "men are branded as guilty of domestic violence and incest on allegations alone and must live with the stigma for the rest of their lives even when proven innocent”.243
In fact research does not support the allegation that either sexual abuse or domestic violence is commonly falsely claimed. Australian research on child sexual abuse allegations made during Family Court proceedings suggested that in the majority of cases where allegations were made they were not being used as the tool of a vindictive parent.244 Similarly research by the NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics into the use of apprehended domestic violence orders found that the majority of complainants had experienced physical violence on more than one occasion.245
Some fathers' rights groups acknowledge that genuine cases of violence and abuse may exist, but for them preventing false complaints is more important than the protection of the victim in genuine cases. For example, some have suggested that apprehended violence orders should only be granted if the offence of assault has been established in a criminal court.246 The Gippsland Child Support Action Group has submitted that ex-parte protection orders should be abolished.247 Men's Confraternity suggests that restraining orders should be backed up by "physical, photographic and medical evidence immediately after the alleged event and further corroborated by witnesses to the event".248 It suggests that if a domestic violence complaint is made and no internal or external evidence of physical violence can be found on medical examination, then the complainant should be charged with making a false complaint.
B. Violence as "marital discord"
Other groups suggest solutions that imply that domestic violence either does not really exist or is the responsibility of both parties. For example Parent Without Rights states that:
Magistrates should ignore the hype and hysteria created by very vocal women's groups and sensationalised by the mass media. Intervention orders create more hostility between the parties and do nothing towards the health and well being of the children.249
The Family Law Reform Party asserts that "state laws on domestic violence should be amended to require where domestic violence is alleged to have occurred that both parties attend counselling immediately".250 The implication in offering mediation or counselling as a solution to violence is that violence is a negotiable interpersonal issue.251 This group also suggests that mediation and access centres be established. Amongst other services, these centres could maintain child contact for:
Fathers accused of child sexual molestation... These centres could prove or disprove any accusations made against the father of any child sex abuse by inhouse camera support of access visits.252
This suggestion obviously could not assist in proving or disproving accusations about the father's past behaviour. While it might go some way towards placating a mother against whom a contact order has been made contrary to her wishes, there seems to be little consideration of the trauma that a child would be put through if the accusations were true,253 As Elizabeth Jones and Patrick Parkinson have noted, contact in such circumstances might "be made safe by supervision, but it cannot readily be regarded as healthy".254
C. Degendering violence
Some groups go further and argue that there is an inherent bias in focussing on the protection of women and children from male violence because women are in fact as violent or abusive as men and this is unreflected in official practice. For example, Men's Confraternity argues that "[b]oth men and women are equally capable of being aggressors and have an equal chance of being victims".255 The studies that the groups rely on, if any, in making these assertions are those which are based on a system of measuring domestic violence, called the "'conflict tactics scales" (CTS) which measures discrete acts of violence and ignores the motivations for these acts.256 For example, from CTS measurements, it is unknown whether an act was done in an attempt to coerce compliance, to induce fear, or in self defence. Additionally, the CTS does not connect injury with the violence that caused it. The results are, therefore, extremely problematic, and many criticisms made of the CTS have now been accepted by its creator.257
Even more questionable methods of demonstrating that women are as violent or abusive as men are used by some groups. Men's Confraternity submits that women abuse men verbally and psychologically by denying them their sexual needs.258 This submission appears to give credence to the recently abolished legal fiction that a wife has given advance and irrevocable consent to sexual intercourse with her husband.259 Lone Fathers argue that provocation to domestic violence is in itself domestic violence.260 Other groups argue that denial of access, characterised as primari1y a female form of behaviour, is child abuse because it deprives the child of access to their male parent and causes them trauma and suffering.261 Lone Fathers argues that divorce is child abuse, and goes so far as to suggest that Family Court judges are perpetrators of child abuse when they do not enforce access orders.262
D. Violence as evidence of victimisation
An uneasy fit with this minimisation or disappearance of male violence is the fact that almost all fathers' rights groups at some point strategically acknowledge the existence of the phenomenon of male violence. But they rarely take responsibility for it, or acknowledge the impact it has on its targets. In fact the violence is generally blamed on factors outside the men who perpetrate it, such as the custodial parent, the Family Court263 and the Family Law Act.264 It is linked to the use of restraining orders265 the fact that sole custody is invariably vested women,266 the adversarial system;267 the cost of child support268 and the denial of access to men.269 In an ironic twist, male violence is used by these groups to demonstrate how victimised men are by the family law system. Violence is something caused in men like stress or illness, and is therefore evidence of their suffering. For example, Parent Without Rights states that "if our pleas had been heeded there would be more children and their fathers alive today. Custodial parents using children as a weapon has led to tragedies, violence, bitterness and murder-suicide".270
Men's Confraternity comments that men need to be given a legal alternative to violence which is caused by frustration because wives don't maintain their marriage vows and promises (to provide satisfaction of his "physiological need for constant sperm release") whereas men are legally obliged to live up to theirs (to satisfy her need to be "financially dependent").271 Lone Fathers says that domestic violence and child abduction "will continue to be the remedies and escape routes for distraught people who have been betrayed by their partner's false and neglected promises in marriage and by the gender biases prevalent in our society and in the Family Court".272 According to this organisation, being asked to pay maintenance without getting access and being charged with contempt of court for disobedience of court orders273 are some of the causes of such violence. It adds that:
The people who resort to violence are reacting to the reality of their children being kidnapped (however officially so) their possessions being unfairly divided and their voices being unheard by the functionaries of the Family Court system. This is not a time to tell these people that “you do not own your children, they are not material possessions". These people own the relationship with their children and they act on the consideration of life with or without their relationship with their children...274
McMurray and Blackmore, interviewing non-custodial fathers, comment that the "most alarming issue related to the men's coping strategies concerned their attitude towards violence against women... [34 per cent]... spoke sympathetically of custody-related murder-suicides."275
One of the few strong expressions condemning the use of violence in the context of family break up is to be found from the Family Law Injustice Group Helping Together. In its newsletter it strongly advises men against responding to frustration with violence:
ABOVE ALL, SHOW NO VIOLENT EXPRESSIONS, NO AGRO. .1 don't mean to be harsh but I can't water it down... no matter how bad you feel, hurting the children or killing yourself won't change anything, neither will battering your ex.276
234 ALRC, Children. See also LFAA (ALRC, Equality and LFAA Conference, 1997): the Family Life Movement (JSC FLA): Men's Confraternity Review of Restraining Orders: the Family Law Reform Party (LFAA Conference, 1997); The Men's Rights Agency (communication with research assistant).
235 ACT (JSC FLA).
236 ALRC, children. See further B Williams, Custody, Access and Accusations of Incest, LFAA, Canberra, 1992 (written by the National President of LFAA).
237 Equal Opportunity Sub-committee (ALRC Matrimonial Property).
238 ALRC, Children
239 Ibid.
240 See for example, the papers by Dr F Williams, “Child Custody and Parental Co-operation", presented at AMA Family Law Section Conference, 1988 and "Preventing Parentectomy Following Divorce" Keynote Address, National Council for Children’s Rights, 5th Annual Conference, Washington DC, 20 October 1990, which have been attached to submissions by LFAA.
241 "Reinstating Patriarchy: the Politics of the Family and the New Legislation” in Mullender and Morley (eds), above, n 66, pp 73-4.
242 ARLC, Intractable Access.
243 ALRC, Equality.
244 M Hume, "Study Of Child Sexual Abuse Allegations within the Family Court of Australia", Conference Paper in Enhancing Access to Justice: Family Court of Australia, Second National Conference, 20-23 September 1995, Sydney, NSW: Family Court of Australia, 1996, pp 205-12.
245 L Trimboli and R Bonney, An Evaluation of the NSW Apprehended Violence Order Scheme, NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research, Sydney, 1997.
246 LFAA, Sydney, (JSC FLA).
247 JSC CFLI: CSS.
248 Review of Restraining Orders.
249 ALRC, Children.
250 JSC CFLI: CSS. Men's Confraternity also suggest that a night court should be established and that both parties should be take there for compulsory counselling and determination of fault if a domestic violence complaint is made (Review of Restraining Orders).
251 See H Astor, "Violence and Family Mediation: Policy", (1994) 8 AJFL 3: F Kaganas and C Piper, “Domestic Violence and Divorce Mediation", JSWFL 265.
252 The Family Law Reform Party home page: http://www.gil.com.au/famlaw/
253 It is also uncertain whether the fathers would be aware of the presence of cameras. if so, it is questionable how much the proposal achieves, given what we know about the ability of abusers to abuse in situations which maintain the secrecy of the abuse: A Hartan, B Johnson, L Roundy and D Williams (eds), The Incest Perpetrator, Sage, California, 1990; C A Dietz and J L Craft, "Family Dynamics of Incest - a New Perspective", (1995) Social Casework 602.
254 "Child Sexual Abuse, Access and the Wishes of Children" (1995)9 International Journal of Law and the Family 54, p 63.
255 Review of Restraining Orders. Elsewhere this group suggests that women are the "main protagonists in family violence". CSAG also claims that women are the perpetrators of domestic violence as much as men. The Men's Rights Agency says that there is no acknowledgment of the fact that women are perpetrators of domestic violence and no provisions protecting men and children from their violence.
256 For example, M A Straus, R J Gelles and S K Steinmetz, Behind Closed Doors: Violence in the American Family. Sage, California, 1980: M A Straus and R J Gelles, "Societal Change and Change in Family Violence from 1975 to 1985 as Revealed by Two National Surveys" (1986) 48 Journal of Marriage and the Family 465. Such studies are referred to expressly by LFAA in their submission to ALRC, Children.
257 See further: R E Dobash and R P Dobash, Women, Violence and Social Change, Routledge London, 1992, particularly pp 271-84; R E Dobash and R P Dobash, "The Politics of Research" in K Yllo and M Bograd (eds), Feminist Perspectives on Wife Abuse, Sage. California, 1988.
258 Men's Confraternity provide a list of psychological, physical, economic, social and institutional violence perpetrated against men. This list includes "withholding", "shunning", “tampering with car brakes", "credit excess", "misuse of family budget funds", "mind poisoning of friends, neighbours, children and relatives to induce them to shun, avoid and deny men an open social relationship", and “religion" (the example provided is "admission of women priests against the Bible's teachings"), (Break the Silence).
259 See K O'Donovan Family Law Matters, Pluto Press, London, 1993, ch 1; M Freeman, “But if You Can't Rape Your Wife, Who(m) Can You Rape?” (1981)15 Family Law Quarterly 1; C Boyle, "Married Women - Beyond the Pale of the Law of Rape" (1981)1 Windsor Yearbook of Access to Justice 201.
260 ALRC, Equality; S Hatty, “On the Reproduction of Misogyny: The Therapeutic Management of Violence" in S Hatty (ed) Proceedings of National Conference on Domestic Violence, Vol 1, pp 321-33, describes misogynist ideologies in which women are blamed for their victimisation and men are absolved of responsibility for their violence.
261 LFAA (ALRC Children).
262 LFAA (Barry Williams, LFAA Conference, 1997).
263 The Australian Family Law Action Group talks about the large number of murder-suicides for which the Family Court is directly responsible (JSC FLA). The Family Law Action Group suggests that judges are "accessories to murder, suicide and countless cases of mental breakdown" (JSC CFLI: CSS).
264 Women Who Want to be Women comment that the injustice of the Family Law Act has driven otherwise law-abiding citizens to actions of desperation - suicide, kidnapping etc (JSC FLA).
265 The Family Law Reform Party argues (JSC CFLI: CSS) that making ex parte restraining orders available "totally ignores the emotional trauma that is created by an order that fails to hear both sides of an argument and creates an emotional crises that many times leads to murder and suicide”.
266 Parent Without Rights (JSC FLA).
267 The Family life Movement blames the violence on the inappropriate adversarial system and suggests that mediation results in less stress, illness and "provoked" violence (JSC FLA).
268 The Family Law Reform and Assistance Association comments that "if Australia is appearing to lead the way in child support reforms then it is doing so through anguish, heartaches, marital breakdowns and murder/suicide" (JSC CFLI: CSS).
269 Parents without Partners (communication with research assistant); The Family Life Movement (JSC FLA).
270 ALRC, Intractable Access.
271 “[W] omen have had their marriage needs [children] fulfil ed but men's ongoing need for sexual release will require servicing continuously by her in a monogamous marriage relationship." So she institutes a "post- pregnancy programme of verbal and psychological abuse, particularly to avoid having sexual intercourse with her husband. This non-servicing of his needs is not enforceable under the marriage vows and he can in fact be punished under rape in marriage legislation." (Break the Silence).
272 LFAA, (ALRC, Equality): '“The Family Law Court has demonstrated its lack of respect and contempt towards the community and its rulings, has encouraged the violence never before known in Australian history."
273 LFAA, Qld, (ALRC, Contempt).
274 LFAA, Rockhampton, (JSC FLA).
275 "Influences on Parent-Child Relationships in Non-Custodial Fathers" (1993)14 Australian Journal of Marriage and Family 151 at p 154. Some groups and/or individuals use the violence in an attempt to bully the Family Court or reform bodies. See for example, T Taylor, "Australian Terrorism: Traditions of Violence and the Family Court Bombings" (1992) 8 Australian Journal of Law and Society 1 at p 29, who discusses the response of some fathers' rights groups to the family court bombings: It is not surprising that a man in the audience told a meeting of FLAG (Family Law Action Group), "You will get more response from the politicians about changing the (Family Law) Act if a few more get killed"
276 FL1GHT Newsletter.